Hi All! My name is Kim Rayfield. I am a wife of just over 3 years to a
Navy Supply Officer on the USS Pennsylvania, a submarine, and mother to two
precious littles that keep me ON. MY. TOES. Jacob is 2 ½ years and Gracelyn 7 ½
months.
Recently I have been up to my eyeballs in diapers, potty training,
rocking to sleep, re-rocking to sleep, boo-boo kissing, and toy picking up—only
to pick them up again 20 minutes later. (Why-oh-why do I persist in continually
picking them up then?!) The words that primarily come out of my mouth these
days are:
“No SIR, sister is NOT for hitting.”
“That’s 3; take a timeout.”
“Dude, put your pants BACK ON…people are
coming over!!”
If you’re a mother or have worked with little ones, I’m
sure you can imagine how busy home life can be. Quiet time with God has been
difficult, even rare, over the past three years. It’s just been recently that I realized how truly
dry I’ve become and how much I am craving the Living Water. Many times I’ve struggled to connect with God
in the same way that I did as a single woman in ministry. Do you ever question
how to connect with God in the midst of life’s chaos? I SURE have over the past three years. I used to have built-in spiritual retreat
days and times AT WORK for quiet time with God.
I spent every day in my Bible.
Now I’m lucky to read it once a week.
And I’ve wondered if God and I can EVER have the kind of connection we
once had.
In reading over 1 Peter, verses 1:6-7a just kept hitting
me between the eyes over and over, “So be TRULY GLAD. There is wonderful joy
ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is
genuine. It is being tested as fire
tests and purifies gold – though your faith is FAR MORE PRECIOUS than mere gold”
(NLT).
Be Truly Glad.
Be TRULY GLAD.
These past three years have certainly tested my faith and my ability to
be “truly glad.” I left full-time ministry, got married and got pregnant over
the course of less than a year. During
our 3 years of marriage, we moved to Charleston, SC; Pensacola, FL; Newport,
RI; spent a year apart while my husband did school and I waited out my
pregnancy in Martinsville, IN; and now to Washington state where we’ve spent
the last several months trying to re-integrate as a family. I’ve attended
several churches, but never long enough to “plug-in.”
I could go on and on but let me get to the point. My attitude has slipped to full on
WHINY-HEINEY over the past few years.
I’ve blamed God for our deteriorated relationship and not allowed the
daily trials of my life to “show that my faith is genuine.” Consequently, I’ve felt worn out and
insignificant, and not sure what to do about it.
My son has a children’s Bible that we read at breakfast almost daily.
And if I forget…it won’t be long before Jacob is saying, “Mama, mama: GOD
BOOK!” The writer of the Jesus Storybook
Bible is continually referring to God’s “Never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking,
always and forever love.” Seriously, throughout the entire Old and New Testament
the writer refers to God’s love for his children in this way. One day, while
reading God Book to Jacob it hit me: God is no less present in my life as I
wipe bottoms, tears, and yucky hands, as He was when I had the luxury of
sitting quietly in a room reading His word and talking with Him. Our relationship looks DIFFERENT, but it’s no
less significant. I may not be able to spend hours in His word but I can invite
and welcome Him into every moment of my every day.
Okay, so “be truly glad.” I want a heart adjustment. I LONG for one,
and I believe that a heart adjustment is the key for me to connect with God
more deeply. God promises in 1 Peter
1:6-7a that wonderful joy awaits, that the trials will not last for long and
that the things I go through will purify my faith. I will cling to these
promises in the chaos…in the mundane…in the every day. I may not be able to spend hours in God’s
word…but as I tell Jacob and Gracie about his never stopping love, I can ask
God to firmly plant that into my own heart. I can recognize His presence in
every moment and be thankful for it!
___________________
For more information on the Jesus Storybook Bible, visit their website here. Kim was formerly a Children's Pastor and has a good eye for usable and fun materials!
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